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This also works if you’re in a more established relationship.

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In my article on why guys suddenly lose interest, I discussed how caring too much or stressing over your relationship can irreparably damage it. When you eliminate the care (or worry or stress or whatever you want to call it), you are free to really be in the relationship. Realize stressing gets you nowhere First, you need to realize that getting all wound up over the state of your relationship serves no purpose, ever.

The article sparked an avalanche of e-mails and comments from women who were feeling panicked over the state of their relationship. You can see the other person for who he is and you can give yourself to him freely – no strategy, no game-playing, no manipulation. You can just be and there is no greater feeling than that. How do we stop our minds from spinning into overdrive, sending out waves of unpleasant thoughts and alarm bells? It causes problems within the relationship, and more importantly, it takes a huge toll on your sense of self and self-esteem.

MORE: 5 Ways to Ruin a Budding Relationship I’m not saying the relationship will be doomed after this point, but I can guarantee it will cause a major shift in the dynamic and it will definitely ruin your ability to actually enjoy the relationship anymore.

Rather than reflexively panicking when something seems amiss, set a deadline.

Maybe you’d like to go on dates more regularly or see him a few times during the week.

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