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“There are some people here that have what we call ‘the upgrade problem.’ Why would I settle down with someone?

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Blatant stealing of expensive home electronic equipment from stores like a Best Buy . But the “Parks and Recreation” star, who often riffs on relationships in his act, turns serious on the subject in his new book, “Modern Romance” (Penguin Press), out Tuesday.

that’s kind of hard to work with,” he tells The Post.

After Tanaka signed with the Yankees, the Japanese press reported that Satoda would be performing on Broadway, but that turned out to be just a rumor.

When Satoda and Tanaka got engaged, she said being a good wife was more important than her career, and she’s stayed true to that.

He was well on his way to a Cy Young award when his season was derailed by an elbow injury in early July.